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BDSM: Bringing Something New to Your Sex Life

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Are you a “vanilla” lover who has gotten bored beneath the sheets of prudence and traditional intimacy? Are you game to paint your life behind the bedroom door fifty shades more colorful? If so, veer away from the over-trodden path and take a detour through the kinky BDSM road now!

BDSM is an expression of a person’s sexuality. It involves bondage and discipline, dominance and submission, sadism and masochism—thus the initialism. It also involves role-playing and a cornucopia of fantasies, such as hot and heavy encounters between royalty and subject, master and slave, guard and prisoner, doctor and nurse, teacher and student, captor and hostage.

The practice is absolutely nowhere near mainstream. But it is fast gaining popularity, with adults finding it in themselves to defy convention. And this is not even because Lady Gaga seems to show that anyone can learn the BDSM ropes quite easily.

BDSM for Beginners

If you are a newbie in the BDSM arena but are willing to be a student who can be taught quickly, find an über-eager teacher. In case you are too shy to look for someone in physical settings, search online.

There are plenty of BDSM dating websites and apps that specifically cater to adults with kinks, fetishes, and fantasies. These can recommend adults near you who are ready for your private education.

Before joining digital communities, check out some of the basic BDSM terms and concepts:

#1- Blindfolding

In dominance-submission intimacies, blindfolding allows the “dom” to control the “sub” and the sub to place his or her full trust in the dom. Here, the dominant partner will awaken the submissive partner’s senses, using body parts (like lips and fingers) or inanimate objects (like wine and feathers) that emit arousing smells or evoke titillating feelings.

The suspense teases the sub and drives him or her to the edge of orgasm. Meanwhile, the thrill of watching the sub go wet and wild will make the dom want to climax.

#2- Restraining

In bondage-discipline intimacies, restraining can be a way to suppress freedom in erotic role plays and sexual fantasies. One partner lords over the other and uses restraints, such as a scarf, a necktie, or a pair of toy handcuffs. The satisfaction lies in limiting the movement, stimulating the need to escape, and finally reaching liberation itself.

If you want to try these restraints, exercise care and caution. Wearing them too tight can keep the blood from circulating.

#3- Spanking. 

In sadism-masochism intimacies, spanking is often used as a form of punishment for not following rules or for demanding more than what is deserved. Drawing erotic pleasure from pain is said to be an ages-old practice, as documented by historians of ancient Greece and Rome.

For beginners, one light tap after another on the butt should do the trick.

#4- Consensual Sex

BDSM may be about role-playing that screams inequality between lovers. But in truth, the practice involves consensual carnal acts. You do not have to be a “slave” who is tied to a post with a belt and blindfolded with a scarf while performing oral sex on your “master” if you do not want to. On the flip side, you can be “Your Majesty” laying your royal palm on the cheek of your stubborn subject’s behind…but only if your partner wants to be spanked.

The key to erotically exciting and explosive BDSM sessions is respect, and this should be observed and upheld by both parties.

#5- Safety Rules

Although it appears dangerous, BDSM is safe and superbly satisfying—as long as it is done the right way. When engaging in bondage-discipline, dominance-submission, or sadism-masochism acts, ensure that you and your partner establish and agree on rules. Devise signals for when to start, carry on, or stop.

Conclusion

BDSM dating is an alternative lifestyle, which may not be for everyone. But if you are up for experimenting on sexual frivolities to overcome bedroom boredom, and if you are down with exploring your sensuality on a deeper level, then this practice may just be the solution to your dullness-in-bed problem. However, you need to know your limits and set your boundaries to relish the experience to the hilt—without inflicting harm on yourself or your partner.

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